Invisible Messages on a Pregnant Belly

          My wife is currently 34 weeks pregnant with our third child. I've been tempted to write about the numerous invisible bumper stickers and solicitations that must, somehow, appear on her pregnant belly. I'm serious. From my wife's experience (we've lived in three different states and been a few places during her pregnancies), an American pregnant belly must deliver messages to complete strangers in public including (but not limited to):

1. "Tell me where you passionately stand on the issue of epidural vs. natural childbirth."
2. "Encourage me with either the unique and amazing ease or the graphic horror-film of your birth story, and then tell me I'll probably be just fine."
3. "How's my pregnancy? Am I too big? Too small? Call . . . well, just tell me."
4. "When do you think my due date is? I bet you can tell better than my OB/GYN by just looking at me."
5. "By all means, rub my belly. Don't even bother to ask first."   

          But don't take my word for it as a guy. This afternoon, I stumbled over this article from ChristianityToday Direct that's humorous but also a bit edifying and instructive as to how Christians should have a more hospitable and respectful attitude toward pregnant women. Thankfully, our family's church community doesn't really struggle with this thread's particular list of what not to say to pregnant women.

          Feel free to add to the list!