I could vent a lot into cyberspace about my frustration with the growing “reality show” fad, so I’ll have to restrain myself. But this idea has been sitting with me for a little while. I know how we can improve ABC’s “The Bachelor(ette).”
The problem with the show is that it’s unrealistic. More than a dozen well-to-do and good-looking millennials are gathered in a multi-million dollar mansion nestled in palm trees in a quest to find true love. The tests of true love are dates and getaways that the average-income American could never afford. Apparently, if you can survive weekends in Tahiti and the Greek Isles together, you’ve got a real connection that will last forever. Strangely enough, only a small percentage of the romantic couplings that these tests produce last very long.
Thus, I’ve got an idea to potentially help “The Bachelor(ette)” produce better marriages. I’d suggest evening out the number of guys and girls, and have a list of dates to replace the usual opulent excursions on the show. These dates (situations would be simulated) would better portray married life and test potential lasting connections.
-Episode 1: Couple(s) attends family dinner with both sets of potential in-laws. Potential in-laws are encouraged to be disagreeable with each other on politics, child-rearing, education, etc.
-Episode 2: Men choose the china on a wedding registry. Women plan the bachelor party.
-Episode 3: Couple(s) are sent on a grocery trip to Whole Foods with a $40 budget and two mountain goats, with only half an hour to buy groceries for the month and not make a mess.
-Episode 4: Couple(s) get to take a tour of an orphanage in Romania.
-Episode 5: Couple(s) are required to plan and go on a date with no money in a town of less than 25,000 people.
-Episode 6: Couple(s) cruise through a crime-prone neighborhood during a monsoon and blow a tire.
-Episode 7: Each contestant has an alarm in their house that’s set to sound constantly for an hour and a half, every other hour and a half. The alarm’s volume can only be somewhat lowered by walking around the living room holding an 8-pound blanket with two hands.
-Episode 8: Each contestant is required to do something physically or mentally strenuous for his/her significant other after a long day of work, housework, etc.
-Episode 9: Couples first attend the Antiques Roadshow and then the Monster Truck Rally.
-Episode 10: Each member is privately told that his/her significant other might have a permanent memory loss or mental or physical disability.
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